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🏍️ Returns & Refunds Policy
1. Overview
Welcome to the Throttleha.us Returns Department — a place of mystery, legend, and paperwork that may or may not exist. Because our products are mostly conceptual and powered by imagination, most returns are purely emotional. But we respect the ritual, so here’s how it works.
2. Non-Physical Merchandise
All items sold through Throttleha.us are fictional, satirical, or otherwise non-tangible. As such, there’s nothing to return, nothing to ship, and nothing to restock — but there’s always something to appreciate. Consider your purchase a contribution to the ongoing experiment of digital retail art.
3. If You Really Want a Refund
If you accidentally bought something believing it to be real, don’t worry — no payment was actually processed, and your card is as safe as your sense of humor. In the unlikely event you were charged through some interdimensional glitch, email us and we’ll immediately reverse it with an apology and a firm handshake through the void.
4. Damaged or Defective Items
Since our items exist mostly in the cloud (and occasionally in the imagination of AI engineers), damage is metaphysical. If your virtual exhaust wrap arrives with emotional scuff marks, you may cleanse it through visualization and good lighting.
5. Exchanges
We don’t offer exchanges, but you’re welcome to refresh the page and find a new hallucination that suits your mood.
6. Contact Us
For return-related inquiries, philosophical concerns, or to compliment our fake inventory, contact:
Email: [email protected]
Last updated: May 28, 2025
We get it—not everything fits your bike or your vibe. Here’s how we handle returns and refunds:
đźšš Returns
- You’ve got 14 days from delivery to send it back.
- Item must be unused, in original condition, with original packaging.
- Buyer pays return shipping unless we shipped the wrong item or it arrived damaged.
- Email [email protected] before returning anything so we can get you sorted.
đź’¸ Refunds
- Once your return is received and inspected, we’ll email you.
- If approved, refunds go back to your original payment method within 5–7 business days.
- Original shipping charges are non-refundable unless it was our mistake.
📦 Damaged or Incorrect Items
If your item arrives messed up or isn’t what you ordered, hit us up at [email protected] within 48 hours with photos—we’ll fix it fast.
đźš« Non-Returnable Items
- Clearance or sale items
- Custom or made-to-order gear
- Anything used, installed, or scuffed from a test ride
Questions?
Just email [email protected]. We don’t ghost.
