Description
Funk? Nope. Fresh? Heck yes.
Meet your helmet’s new best friend: a spray so packed with pine power and turbo freshness, it’s basically a unicorn spa day for your gear. One spritz and those gnarly smells vanish faster than your willpower around a cupcake. Side effects include sudden swagger boosts and random fist bumps to strangers (consent encouraged).
Why this stuff is basically magic:
- EPA-unapproved because who needs boring when you’ve got badass freshness?
- Wipes out 90% of stink while cranking your hero aura to 11.
- Sends ego stench packing — keep your crew AND your helmet smelling saintly.
- Double spray? Double legendary status unlocked. No cheat codes needed.
- Warning label? Yep, it’s as easy to ignore as your ex’s texts — totally on purpose.
“Helmet funk? Obliterated. Just pure, unfiltered awesome.” – Gabe P.
Throttleha.us • Parody product • 100% silliness, 1000% epic freshness
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